One of those early morning weekend posts... just out of the blue (this while my wife makes her weekend calls to her mom.. which run into..ahem... anyways)
I am not sure if I know myself well enough. But these are the things I certainly know about moi...
- I never get a good parking lot in a mall. Meaning, if there is a vacant spot just near the entrance which is also the most convenient to park, I never get it. So much so that, I am now convinced that a good parking-vacant-near spot is a Myth. They don't exist. I think the mall owners themselves park all those fake cars near the entrance to create an illusion of their shop being a hit.
- Another thing is a myth IMO. Good Deals. Nopes. They do not exist. Laptops,Sofas,Travel Deals all those things that shallow people like me would crave for at some point... No.. They don't exist. Its now official. I have NEVER EVER got a *deal* in my life. So I have come to a point in my life where I just go and *buy* stuff when I need. Deal or No Deal.
- I think Bad food is also costly. I tried doing this. I went to really really upscale places in Chicago downtown after getting impressed by all the culinary shows on Travel channels. More often than not, I came out with real bad taste in my mouth and deep hole in my pockets. None of these big-plate-small-decoration stuff could ever plug my satisfaction ever. I always have a plan B in place after having a fancy meal. The notion of Big and Hearty meal at upscale places is just that... a Notion.
- I eat and drink very slowly. That's my problem and also a confession. I just cannot keep up with folks speed around me. Usually I am at 2nd beer when most are at 3.5 or so.That's less than 50% of the average speed. I am slow. Very slow.
- I have got 2 speeding tickets thus far in 6 years. Once when I drove at a speed of 37 where 30 was speed limit and once when I drove at 55 when 45 was speed limit. Point is, it embarrasses me to tell the speeds I was caught at and the fact that I was caught at all for driving at those speeds.
- I have no big achievements so far in my life. Something I can brag about or even broadcast publicly. I am as average as an average Joe can be.
I am thinking I am done with half of my life. And I have no plans for remaining half too...
And now, if you'll excuse me I need to do my weekend vacuum..
2 comments:
So Joe the blogger! Looks like you need to work on your beer drinking skills if you want to make it to a Joe six pack.
I hear you on the deals! That is just bogus but I don't try hard anyway so I shouldn't really be complaining. Do you? I doubt it...no pain no gain some would say...
Parking...well, I have had my moments so I don't share your myth..Sorry.
I think I can top your speeding ticket situation though. I got a speeding ticket for driving at 32mph on a 25 mph. In a desolate frikkin' island resort off the virginia coast...
IMO, There is nothing average about anything...if there is a myth about anything it is that...
Nice post...good luck with the cleaning!
Agree with the deals/parking/speeding tickets/pretentious food, but "no big achievements"...DUDE...that's not a myth. Knowing what you have done - esp. the very personal story you told me.....NO WAY..I VEHEMENTLY deny your claim of not having any big achievements. That in any books is a HUGE GRANDE VENTI..GRANDE SUPREMO achievement. Achievements need not be measured in olympic golds, oscars, bharat ratnas, bank accounts, nobels. So I respectfully demand that you strike that last item from your list. Capisce?
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